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Communication is intrinsic to our everyday life. Dann shares wisdom and practical tools to communicate successfully.
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BRAVE COMMUNICATION - DAN FARRELLY
Communication is intrinsic to our everyday life.
Ephesians 4:2 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, 3 being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.
IT’S NOT NECESSARILY WHAT WE FIGHT ABOUT, IT’S HOW WE FIGHT ABOUT IT.
- A lot of the times, we are more careless than careful during conflict
- It’s better in life to make small adjustments, communicating as things happen, then having to “deal with an issue” later
Whenever you hear or have a strong emotion/When you’re confused/When you’re problem solving, use these tools:
KNOW WHAT YOU ARE FEELING
- Are you mad, sad, or afraid?
- We either let our emotions control us or we ignore our emotions and they control us anyways
- We have to recognize our emotions so we can become comfortable with them
CAREFULNESS IN COMMUNICATION DEMANDS PREPARATION
- Read a book or listen to a message on communication, practice communication
- Communication is a set of skills you can actually get better at
- By taking on outward rules, you can help your inward reality.
- Conflict is an opportunity to build trust and intimacy in relationship
COMMUNICATION IS NOT STANDARDIZED.
- Everyone communicates differently
- We have these codebooks that have been built/written throughout our lives based on our experiences and what we were taught.
- No one’s codebook is the same, we have all been taught differently and have had different life experiences.
- Use the phrase, “I’m wondering if…” to check on what they’re actually communicating
- Be willing to renegotiate a new “normal.”
LISTEN AND REFLECT WHAT YOU HEARD.
- Repeat back what someone said
- Ignore the content, listen to the emotion
- “I feel..when..because…so could we…”
- Builds intimacy by revealing your emotional world
OUR EMOTIONS ARE NOT THE REAL US.
- They are an important part of us, but they are tempered by the other parts of us.
These tools will maximize your potential as a leader.