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Brave Communication

Dann Farrelly

Communication is intrinsic to our everyday life. Dann shares wisdom and practical tools to communicate successfully.

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BRAVE COMMUNICATION - DAN FARRELLY

Communication is intrinsic to our everyday life.

Ephesians 4:2 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, 3 being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

IT’S NOT NECESSARILY WHAT WE FIGHT ABOUT, IT’S HOW WE FIGHT ABOUT IT.

  • A lot of the times, we are more careless than careful during conflict
  • It’s better in life to make small adjustments, communicating as things happen, then having to “deal with an issue” later

Whenever you hear or have a strong emotion/When you’re confused/When you’re problem solving, use these tools:

KNOW WHAT YOU ARE FEELING

  • Are you mad, sad, or afraid?
  • We either let our emotions control us or we ignore our emotions and they control us anyways
  • We have to recognize our emotions so we can become comfortable with them

CAREFULNESS IN COMMUNICATION DEMANDS PREPARATION

  • Read a book or listen to a message on communication, practice communication
  • Communication is a set of skills you can actually get better at
  • By taking on outward rules, you can help your inward reality.
  • Conflict is an opportunity to build trust and intimacy in relationship

COMMUNICATION IS NOT STANDARDIZED.

  • Everyone communicates differently
  • We have these codebooks that have been built/written throughout our lives based on our experiences and what we were taught.
  • No one’s codebook is the same, we have all been taught differently and have had different life experiences.
  • Use the phrase, “I’m wondering if…” to check on what they’re actually communicating
  • Be willing to renegotiate a new “normal.”

LISTEN AND REFLECT WHAT YOU HEARD.

  • Repeat back what someone said

ACTIVE LISTENING

  • Ignore the content, listen to the emotion

“I” MESSAGES

  • “I feel..when..because…so could we…”
  • Builds intimacy by revealing your emotional world

OUR EMOTIONS ARE NOT THE REAL US.

  • They are an important part of us, but they are tempered by the other parts of us.

These tools will maximize your potential as a leader.

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